Graham OS 1.0 specification sheet
A full technical breakdown of the unit currently in late-stage development. Specifications are subject to change without notice, as is standard for pre-release hardware.
Dimensions & Weight
Currently expanding in beta. Final shipping weight TBD — early builds trend larger week over week, with no signs of a stable release candidate before October.
Audio Output
Upgraded dual-lung exhaust system equipped with high-decibel alert notifications for immediate troubleshooting (feeding, diapers). No mute switch identified in beta testing.
Power Source
100% liquid-fueled, requiring frequent refueling intervals around the clock. Runtime between charges: unpredictable. Fast-charging supported; full charge cycle not observed.
Sleep Mode
Highly unpredictable. Factory settings indicate sleep mode may frequently disable itself between 2:00 AM and 5:00 AM, with no user-accessible setting to change this behavior.
Requires
Two (2) exhausted but willing Co-Founders, minimum
Not compatible with
Sleeping through the night, quiet restaurants, white furniture
Warranty
18 years, non-transferable, emotionally binding